Issue 96

News: The Top 10 Greatest Song Parts.
Once, I read somewhere a list of the hundred greatest parts of songs, not to be confused with the 100 Greatest Songs, but specific parts of songs, viz a line from "A Boy Named Sue" taking a spot. Here is my list of the Top 10 Greatest Song Parts of All Time. Most, if not all, of these songs have at least one video on YouTube.
10. "The One And Only." By Chesney Hawkes (British One-Hit Wonder). SOng Part: The Intro up until the first line of the lyrics. The rest of the song sucks in comparison. That particular part is also in AMV Hell 3 (around 20 Minutes in, lasting around 5 seconds), which is what turned me on to the song in the first place.
9. "Big Balls" by AC/DC. Song Part: The Lyrics "The Social Pages Say I've Got the Biggest Balls of all". If I were to host a radio show, I would have this as part of my theme. Part Two will be Number one.
8. "A Day in the Life" by The Beatles. Song Part: The Never-ending final chord.
7. "Closer" by Nine Inch Nails. Song PArt: The piano motif at the very end of the song (used on the same keyboard used to record "Strawberry Fields Forever"). Surprisingly to most people who know me, I actually think that NIN is not that band, and this song could be done much justice in a more funk idiom. Admittedly, this will not be most people's cups of tea.
6. "Mother We Just Can't Get Enough" by The New Radicals. Song Part:First part is in The very beginning, just before the infectious riff that the rest of the song is built around, there is a "Face-melting" guitar riff. The Second Cool part comes when Gregg is heard shouting seemingly unintelligibly around three minutes in. Of course, it can be made out, for the most part.
5. "Love is All Around" by Wet Wet Wet. Song Part: In the D-Em-G-A chord progression, there is an isolated "G" note. This spin on the chord progression makes this version pass the Troggs' original version as the best version of this song.
4. "Melody" by Serge Gainsbourg. Song Part: The opening bass riff. Serge Gainsbourg makes Marvin Gaye sound like Abstinence Rock (to the best of my knowledge Abstinence Rock is not a real band.)
3. "Hurdy Gurdy Man" by Donovan. Song Part: The end section wherein everything reaches a cacophonous crescendo, surprisingly after the song opens with some humming and strummed guitars.
2. "Fire on High" by ELO. Song Part: The guitar riff. The Best Rhythm Guitar riff in an instrumental song ever.
1. "Ana Ng" by They Might Be Giants. SOng Part: The Intro riff. If I ever manage to get a radio show, this will be the second part of the theme song. E5 E5 E5 E5 E5 C5 C5 D5 D5 forever!

Band Name of the Day: Abstinence Rock. Since such a band doesn't seem to exist, I am putting this reminder for a band name, especially one who tends to use the name with tongue placed firmly in cheek (pun may or may not have been intended).

Film Idea of the Day: Metalmouth. An archetypal slasher franchise with a twist: The murderer's weapon of choice is his radio-recieving steel dentures.

Film Review of the Day: Mr. Bean's Holiday. Recently, I saw this movie, apparently the end of the Mr. Bean saga, wherein Bean travels to the south of France for a vacation, but gets sidetracked by an actress and a director's child. Will he survive being pegged as his kidnapper and finally go to the beach? Will this be as funny as the other films and TV Series? Why am I asking you these questions?

Quote of the Day: "My NAme is Sue! How Do You Do! Now You're gonna die!"
______________Johnny Cash and Shel Silverstein, "A Boy named Sue."

Link of the Day: Yet another Youtube video I like.

Issue 95

News: Piper at The Gates of Dawn 3-Disc Set.
Forty years ago, there was a new band on the horizon. It would take years for them to truly find their niche, but their first album was released in 1967, under the name Piper at the Gates of Dawn. That band was Pink Floyd. This was the only full album with their original frontman, noted psychotic Syd Barrett, before he truly lost his mind and left, leaving behind an album and a few non-album tracks. The album remained in print when the band hit the big time and Syd gained a massive cult following. The non-album tracks, for the most part, did not. While 3 of the five non-album tracks were released on another album, the other two were only released on a companion disc exclusive to a boxed set of most of the Pink Floyd albums, and an EP which didn't remain in print for long... Until now. This new release manages to put together the mono and stereo versions of the album and the aforementioned singles, as well as some alternate versions of some tracks. Admittedly, I am a bit disappointed that some of the other unreleased songs Pink Floyd did in this era like "Lucy Leave", "Vegetable Man", and "Scream thy Last Scream" weren't on the disc, but it certainly does not surprise me that EMI is still reluctant to release them. When my dad noticed the price on the album, he told me "Syd better be worth it." I assure you, he is worth it, as long as he can be found.

Band Name of the Day: Helpful Corn. From an episode of Daria.

Film Idea of the Day: Untitled, but best done as a book of short stories. It is about three college students, specifically a writer and his two dysfunctional roomies whom he cannot seem to shake off; a consummate idiot and stoner who calls himself "His Highness King Tim, Sovereign of All Stoners", and a pansexual dwarf who ceased to age sometime around second grade.

Film Reviews of the Day: Across the Universe. I haven't seen any other work by Julie Taymor, but I knew I had to see this one because it had a soundtrack made up entirely of Beatles songs sung by the cast. Fortunately, the drive to Rosemont was worth it, even if Revolver could have been better represented in the soundtrack.

Natural Born Killers. Oliver Stone's controversial tribute to the American media's curious obsession with violence was seen recently by me and I must say that even with its unusual (an less enlightened one could even say distracting) cinematography and filming style (even with bleeped out cursing in some scenes), it certainly causes me to question why American media tends to focus on violence and even creates more violent criminals, just like Michael Moore said in Bowling For Columbine.

Quote of the Day: "Mickey and Mallory know the difference between right and wrong; they just don't give a damn. "
_______Steven Wright on Mickey and Mallory in Natural Born Killers.

Link of the Day: One Daria fansite I have started to frequent.

Issue 94

News: My College Application to BJU.
I am now a senior in High school, which means lots of college applications. Here's one I made up for a lark to Bob Jones University.
Dear Fundies,
I am a freethinker (or as you'd probably say, Devil Worshipper) who has been ordained in the ULC. I have never married anybody with this authority, but when I actually start to marry people, I believe that homosexuals and interracial couples have as much of a right to misery as heterosexuals. I am also a Rock n Roller who plays guitar and sing. Some of my favorite songs are about religion, such as Billy Joel's "Only the Good Die Young", Depeche Mode's "Blasphemous Rumours", Jethro Tull's "Wind Up", John Lennon's "Imagine", Bob Dylan's "With God on Our Side", etc. I was raised Lutheran and Currently go to a Catholic school. It is my firm belief that Nietzsche was right when he said that if we excluded all those Christians who messed up Christ's message beyond recognition, we would exclude everybody with the exception of Christ himself. Also, I estimate that most of my wardrobe is from Abercrombie and Fitch (hope you're not too shocked by that). I am also a writer, and have written about you people on an earlier edition of my blog. So, When do I get in?
Sincurely (sic) Yours,
Rev. Derek.
(Thanks to Dad for giving me the idea, but originally suggesting Billy Graham's other alma mater, Wheaton college. FYI, everything I wrote about in my blog, even the A&F clothes [The only part which doesn't apply to me], has been picked out specifically to offend the people at BJU.)

Band Name: The Iraq. From Caitlin Upton's speech below.

Film Idea: Untitled as of yet, but is a remake of Cinema Paradiso taking place mostly in Chicago from the last days of Hollywood's Golden Age to the Vietnam War, about the return of a Canadian film director to his original hometown of Chicago, where he learned about film from a projectionist until he escaped to Canada to avoid the Draft.

Film Review: Cape Fear. I just saw the 1991 remake version and I must say that Scorsese (and also DeNiro) made an enormous improvement to the original 1962 version. DeNiro's portrayal of Max Cady has improved greatly on Robert Mitchum's portrayal (in my opinion, turning from a proto-parrothead with a strange fixation on violence to a pure sociopath.) Curiously, I find Peck's original portrayal to be better than Nick Nolte.

Quote of the Day: "I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some, uh, people out there in our nation don't have maps and, uh, I believe that our, uh, education like such as, uh, South Africa and, uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and, I believe that they should, uh, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., uh, or, uh, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future, for our [children]."
________________Caitlin Upton, Miss Teen South Carolina 2007.

Link of the Day: A site inspired by Caitlin's speech.

Issue 93

News: Derekaxe contra Wagner.
Earlier in the week, there came the 157th Anniversary of the premiere of Lohengrin. Many people know about the opera for two pieces: Its overture and, to a larger extent, a piece popularly referred to as "The Bridal Chorus" or "The Wedding March". One fact I learned is that the church of which I am a de facto member (even if my family has since avoided it in recent years like the plague) has officially denounced it for a large variety of reasons, none of which include the reason I have for hating the piece (stumbling upon the article has caused me to add a note in my "Catch the Wind" treatment advising against using the piece in the mock-wedding ceremony). While I disapprove of the institution of marriage in general (a fact which has not deterred me from becoming ordained in the Universal Life Church [I joined primarily because the Beatles were also ministers and to shut up people who think I am not qualified to talk about religion like I do], which gives me the authority to marry people), the use of Wagner's Bridal Chorus is one of the biggest problems I, personally, have with marriage. For me this is not because of Wagner's virulent anti-semitism (which he, fortunately, kept separate from his work in music as far as we know) which borders on proto-Naziism, but because of the unfortunate context in which it was originally placed in the opera (contrary to the LCMS FAQ writer's claims). In the original context, it was in the processional to the bridal chambers (as opposed to the processional towards the altar), which would have merely raised my eyebrows; What really irks me is that, soon after the song is over, said marriage turns out to be a complete failure. Similarly, the song "I will always love you" (as popularized by Whitney Houston), "the song" of countless couples since 1990's The Bodyguard, is about a bitter breakup, which even Whitney Houston acknowledged. (Whatever happened to songs like "Lady in Red" or "Bette Davis Eyes"?) So, there you have it; Odds are, the music that accompanied you to the altar was merely written as a prelude for disaster.

Bandname of the Day: Dr. Acula, from a film and character title envisioned by Ed Wood Jr.

Film idea of the Day: None

Film Review of the Day: Ed Wood. I saw this film a few days ago, and Johnny Depp's performance shows me the kind of man I see myself becoming in 15 years: an artist who creates art by following his heart in the most bizarre way possible, maybe even with ex-stars popularly believed to be dead.

Quote of the Day: "I don't have a girlfriend. I just know a woman who would be really mad to hear me say that."
____Mitch Hedberg.

Link of the Day: Want to take care of a Born-Again Christian's pets after the Rapture? Go Here. If not, go here anyway and get a few laughs.

Tract Review: There Go The Dinosaurs. Jack's in(s)ane view of the extinction of dinosaurs. They were not destroyed by climate changes brought by a comet, but by a combination of hunting by humans and post-flood changes in the air which somehow didn't affect any other type of animals. This is what Chick (and his scientific "source", Kent Hovind), even after it has been effectively refuted numerous times, seriously believes.